Category Archives: Commentary

What To Do When Your Marriage Starts Slipping Through Your Fingers

Your marriage can be saved! All marriages have moments where you will ask yourself, “Is this hopeless?”, or “Will this ever get better?”. These all seem like no way out situations, but after 28 years of marriage, the author gives us a list of ideas that we can work on to do better. Overall, the best thing to do is to take inventory and see that YOU are worth it. YOU can change your behavior. First thing is to stay positive, second is to stay present. Start doing things without expectation and that includes changing your partner.

You must accept who you are but past that:
1. Listen and show empathy
2. Make sure that you agree on things you can agree on
3. Work on a few things for your partner that would make their life better
4. Show compassion and start hugging and kissing
5. Feel better that you are working on things. It won’t happen right away, but your marriage will get better.
6. Take the lead
7. Learn how to share your thoughts without being scared. You need to develop that trust with your partner.

Without working towards things, your marriage will never get better.

Key Takeaways:

  • beginnings of relationships are exciting and unpredictable almost taking over your every thought
  • as you get more comfortable with each other you notice that everything is not so perfect
  • if you care enough for each other you accept the good and which makes your life more meaningfull

“Long-term relationships are a roller coaster, they can be difficult, they do have their hard times but it’s from these we gain that strength to face the challenges that life throws at us.”

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/what-to-do-when-your-marriage-starts-slipping-through_us_59529762e4b0c85b96c65d20?section=us_divorce

What Future for the Family?

The concept of a “family” has taken many different perspectives over the past decades. The prototypical family has always been viewed as a couple with two children. However, decades have gone by and various cultural changes have changed the perspective of the modern family. Females are viewed as more powerful and having no children at all is becoming more common. Same sex couples have also been a growing trend. With the way the current economy is shifting, pressure is being put back onto many relatives.

Key Takeaways:

  • In previous generations, marriages were created as social alliances or an attempt to create a male heir to continue the family name.
  • Many recent family trends in society are breaking with traditional stereotypes.
  • Single family homes, same-sex headed families, childless families and serial monogamy are all become more common-place.

“The cereal packet family is the archetype of the nuclear family, which consists of a couple and their dependent children.”

Read more: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/hide-and-seek/201708/what-future-the-family

10 Big, Divorce-Proofing Talks To Have Before Getting Married

Marriage is a happy moment and it’s hard to keep in mind that statistics indicate divorce is a possibility for many of us. But psychologists tell us that there are life experiences that are known to be difficult ones and you can divorce-proof your relationships by having open discussions about them ahead of time. Among things to consider are finances, children and monogamy. Whether or not these have easy solutions, discussions like these could strengthen a marriage ahead of time.

Key Takeaways:

  • A hugely important quality for a couple to have is the ability to deal with potentially polarizing, important, life-changing topics.
  • Couples should hash out some money management rules, instead of trying to figure it out as they go along.
  • It’s important to deal with resentment hot-buttons, like intimacy preferences and who gets what job.

“You can’t know how you work through disagreements until you have them.”

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/topics-to-discuss-before-marriage_us_596f96b6e4b01696c6a23b7e?section=us_divorce

4 Ways To Overcome A Toxic Relationship

There are several key factors in overcoming a harmful, toxic relationship, and the author of this article has outlined several of them. The most useful ones contain information on self-improvement (rather than shifting the blame) and deal with the underlying reasons why an individual may become entrenched in a toxic, negative relationship to begin with. The overall message comes across in a very clear, concise manner, and is advice that is useful in overcoming the offered problem.

Key Takeaways:

  • The first way to get over a toxic relationship is to admit to yourself that it is toxic
  • You need to know that the relationship is not the best option you have, build a support system and pursue other activities
  • Use the time after a breakup to improve your physical and mental well-being, it will make you ready when the right person comes along.

“The only realistic way out is to stop all contact so that you can start anew.”

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/4-ways-to-overcome-a-toxic-relationship_us_5922f1e0e4b07617ae4cbdf2?section=us_divorce

The Most Important Things To Know About Divorce

The author, Jim Halfens, discusses the most important things to know about divorce in this article. He states that divorce is more likely to happen during the summer or after a vacation, referring to summer time as “the calm before the storm”. Social media also plays a huge role in divorce as spouses have access to ex’s, and pornography. Statistics also show that the younger you marry, the more likely you are to divorce and continue to have failed marriages.

Key Takeaways:

  • Like sloughs after peaks, divorces often erupt after high family-first periods, like summer vacations and winter holidays.
  • Marriage dissolution rates lesson from more than half, for those marrying before age 18, to closer to a third, for those holding out till at least their 20s.
  • Social media, possibly because it fosters easy access to old and new connections, can pay a significant role in marriages ending.

“Over the summer the subject of divorce tends to be all over the media. As CEO of Divorce Hotel I notice that this is the time of year when I receive the highest number of requests to interview.”

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-most-important-things-to-know-about-divorce_us_597ad735e4b09982b7376386?section=us_divorce

There Really is a The One-Minute Marriage Cleanse?

There is a one minute marriage cleanse that can help people out a lot. There are so many things that demand attention from couples and they never have time to spend with each other. They have work and kids and that is a lot to juggle every single day. Gone are the days when a couple can go out on a date night. Things are just too hectic now. Relationships get neglected nowadays because of all the busy people.

Key Takeaways:

  • Taking 1 minute out of your day can help your marriage.
  • Thinking about things you like about your partner can help reinforce feelings towards them.
  • Counseling for couples is not widely used by couples because of a lack of time, therefore solutions like the One-Minute Cleanse have formed.

“One of the most common obstacles I find nowadays in trying to do couples counseling is that couples are just too busy with work demands, children’s activities and a gazillion other day to day things that soak up a couple’s time.”

Read more: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-two-shall-become-one/201707/there-really-is-one-minute-marriage-cleanse

10 Comics You’ll Relate To If You Think Dating Today Is Total B.S.

Who says that comic books must all have Batman or other villains on it to be a great read? If you are an adult who loves comics but who is also dating in a world of BS dating schemes, there are a few reads that you shouldn’t miss out on grabbing. The list includes the 10 titles here. These are all great comics with storylines you are sure to enjoy and find very relatable, too.

Key Takeaways:

  • 24-year Marcella Stranieri has an Instragram account where she shares funny illustrations about dating struggles
  • Drawing cartoons helps Stranieri deal with the awkwardness and uncomfortable situations of dating
  • Stranieri receives comments from followers that they feel the same way and can connect to her drawings.

“If your relationship status is “single and at this point, I think I’ll just stay that way,” you’ll appreciate Marcella Stranieri’s comics.”

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/dating-is-pretty-much-the-worst_us_590b6dfde4b0104c734cd63c?section=us_divorce

How I Learned To Navigate Dating As A Widow

A widow who started dating again only months after losing her husband advises her readers not to make this same mistake. She entered the dating scene to prove her desirability, not because she was ready for a new relationship. She had not yet processed her loss or worked her way through her grief. This widow needed to take time to recover and regain her sense of self. She was physically exhausted from the time she had spent as her late husband’s caregiver. The dating process itself was also exhausting.

Key Takeaways:

  • Deciding, as a widow, if you are even interested, or ready, for dating other people.
  • Have you, as a widow, moved on and coped with your loss in a healthy manner in which you will be able to make a healthy commitment to someone new?
  • Are you aware of what you want out of this new relationship?

“I hear from so many widowed folk who get plenty of love and companionship from friends and family. They don’t want to re-enter the dating fray.”

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/dating-for-widows-and-widowers-5-questions-to-ask_us_59270979e4b0627b74360e00?section=us_divorce

How To Take Your Marriage From Sexless To Steamy, In 7 Steps

People who decided to leave their SM are also suffering. Divorce is never an easy option. No one gets married thinking “in 10 years I am going to divorce”. Many have children who will be affected by divorce. While contemplating divorce, their hearts are in pain as they think how the divorce will affect their children. To tell them that sex will solve their problem is nothing more than a slap in the face. Divorce is also painful because of the many years spent with the spouse. Despite the sexlessness and abuse, there usually are a lot of good memories that are difficult to get rid of. Those memories add to the general unease and anxiety associated with leaving.

Key Takeaways:

  • Many couples have issues with sexless relationships and it needs to be addressed with each other.
  • You must both be honest and open with each other in order to try to come up with new ways to rekindle your sex life.
  • Explore new ideas and techniques that may be out of your norm, but be comfortable and willing to do things your partner may be wanting to try.

“According to data scientist Seth Stephens-Davidowitz, the top-searched marriage complaint on Google is “sexless marriage” ― and it only takes a second to stumble upon advice forums, like the Dead Bedrooms board on Reddit.”

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/sexless-marriage-no-more_us_58d1572ee4b0be71dcf866f4?section=us_divorce

3 Words For Those Who Can’t Cope With Divorce

Nobody ever wants to be divorced. The pain of waking up every day, feeling alone and wondering what the other person is doing can really take an emotion toll on a person. Instead of living your life thinking about the other person and the misery, try to live by three simple words: Enjoy each day. Wake up and think about the positives and find things to do with each day. Your attitude will make everything and help you to get through the divorce.

Key Takeaways:

  • Jackie Pilossoph believes the words “enjoy each day” are especially relevant to those experiencing the throes of divorce.
  • One reader was so distraught by his divorce he called the experience worse than death.
  • Enjoyment is something each one can take an active part in, according to Pilossoph, allowing the divorced person to regain some sense of control.

“I tell newly separated people who are really in the thick of feeling crappy that they should take some time every single day to enjoy something.”

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/3-words-for-those-who-cant-cope-with-divorce_us_58ef7283e4b04cae050dc4ec?section=us_divorce