Category Archives: Commentary

Try separation first, then see if you want to divorce – The Seattle Times

Some people think divorce and separation are the same thing, but they are not. If you want to get a divorce, then you should take it one step at a time. Separate first and see how it feels. This will allow you to adjust to it and see how things may work out ahead. After taking some time to think about the marriage, you will be able to make better choices moving forward.

Key Takeaways:

  • It’s common for people to think separateand-divorce, all one thing, but they’re two different things. Separate (think), divorce (let go).
  • If your marriage isn’t as unhealthy as you made it out to be here, then the solitude, focus and clarity permitted by your separation will help you repair your communication from your two different homes.
  • A dynamic where one spouse pushes all blame onto the other is a textbook formula for your abuse. Drop your plea for couple’s therapy, please, and start going just for you.

“Why not agree to the separation — since it seems to be coming anyway, whether you want it or not — and see how you feel after you adjust to it?”

http://www.seattletimes.com/life/try-separation-first-then-see-if-you-want-to-divorce/

How To Love Someone With Opposite Political Views

Some people may wonder if it is possible to love someone that has opposite political views. You cannot let any politician get in the way of your romance with another person. One woman, who was 73 years old, decided to get a divorce from her husband because he voted for Donald Trump. She did it because she did not want to spend the rest of her life arguing her point of view.

Key Takeaways:

  • Californian Gayle McCormick, 73, said she and her husband of 22 years decided to split up after he mentioned that he planned to vote for Trump.
  • Although he husband changed his mind the damage was done and the couple still decided to split, highlighting how hard it can be to love when you’re at odds politically. 
  • To couples who need advice on this, it is advised that being married to your political opposite compels you to look at your beliefs and sometimes, even question them.

“Micah Leydorf is a former congressional staffer and a conservative married to a liberal. When the divide between her and her husband seems great, she reminds herself that they ultimately share a common belief system.”

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/how-to-love-someone-with-opposite-political-views_us_58a20ff8e4b0ab2d2b17e73d?ir=Divorce&utm_hp_ref=divorce

What Is the Divorce Rate, Really?

The divorce rate is a really hard thing to find out. It has been reported differently by many sources. It turns out that there are so many different factors to consider in this area. One source says that the rate is not on the rise and that two thirds of people will stay married. And then, there are different groups that divorce less. There are projections and theories everywhere on the matter.

Key Takeaways:

  • Is it true that about half of all marriages end in divorce? That should be an easy question to answer. After all, divorce is a very clear event that leaves an official paper trail.
  • That projection, that the percentage of marriages ending in divorce in the future will be just a little over one-third, is just that – a projection, a guess.
  • The probability that a marriage will end in divorce: Researchers typically study this by looking at people from different cohorts – for example, people born in a particular year.

““At the end of the 20th century, 43% to 46% of marriages were predicted to end in dissolution.the common belief that about half of all marriages are voluntarily disrupted is a reasonable approximation.””

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/living-single/201702/what-is-the-divorce-rate-really

In India, Muslim men can end a marriage by saying ‘divorce’ three times. One woman wants to stop that. – Washington Post

A controversial part of India’s legal system is under fire. The country, home to over 170 million Muslims, allows people to follow traditional family laws based in their religion. The controversial aspect is a tradition called the triple talaq, also know as the triple divorce, which allows husbands to legally divorce their wives simply by saying or writing the words “I divorce you” three times.

Key Takeaways:

  • India allows communities to follow family laws that are governed by their religion. But the practice of what is known as triple talaq, or “the triple divorce,” among the country’s 170 million Muslims is one of the most controversial
  • In her petition, Shayara asked the court to declare her divorce illegal and said the triple divorce practice treats women like “chattel.”
  • Prime Minister Narendra Modi’s government told the court in October that the practice is incompatible with the constitution and cannot be regarded as an essential practice in Islam.

“India allows communities to follow family laws that are governed by their religion. But the practice of what is known as triple talaq, or “the triple divorce,” among the country’s 170 million Muslims is one of the most controversial.”

https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/asia_pacific/indian-muslim-men-can-end-a-marriage-by-saying-divorce-three-times-one-woman-wants-to-stop-that/2017/01/30/af0f4f9e-1b32-4e79-8ab3-1e6e89c3ec27_story.html

5 SNEAKY Warning Signs That Mean Your Relationship Is In Trouble

If you have a feeling that your relationship is about to end then you may be right. There are many ways to tell if you relationship may be coming to an end. Not fighting or not talking about your future may just be one of the signs your relationship is ultimately going to end.

Key Takeaways:

  • Look out when you stop fighting because that means your boyfriend, wife, or partner has checked out of the relationship permanently.
  • When you have no idea or care in the world where your partner is or what they are doing, this spells trouble. Maybe it starts innocently enough, but it will be over soon enough.
  • The point is, if they have asked you to work on it, go to marriage counseling, or brought it up several times and there is no movement in the direction of change, your relationship has problems.

“BAT chief executive Nicandro Durante said the company was very pleased to have reached an agreement and looked forward to making the offer to shareholders.”

http://www.yourtango.com/experts/susan-trombetti/what-are-5-red-flags-spell-your-relationship-troub

5 Ways to Ruin a Perfectly Good Argument

An argument can be a great way to get things figured out between two people. Problems arise when people act immature and shut down communication. Problems arise when name calling starts the communication shuts down. One of the best ways to do this is to keep communications open and allow the other person to talk.

Key Takeaways:

  • Asking your partner to let you finish is the most frequently used response, but that can sometimes fuel the situation even more.
  • Sarcasm might have been a big part of your childhood banter with your siblings—trading barbs with a sibling can be a pattern that is rooted deeply in the connection between brothers and sisters.
  • The kitchen-sink fighter may bring up all sorts of things you’re your shared past, citing these are “proof” of your history of poor behavior, whatever the focus today might be.

“Remember, you cannot force someone to change their behavior, but your response to annoying comments is something over which you have complete control.”

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/lifetime-connections/201701/5-ways-ruin-perfectly-good-argument

7 Signs Of A Toxic Relationship With Your S.O.

Dating can be an empowering and wonderful experience. However, there are also significant others who are a strain on our lives and are better off being with someone else. The question becomes, how do we recognize when the relationship has become toxic? How they act about or around your family can be a dead giveaway. They may act like it is a terrible obligation or a favor to you. They also send hurtful or erratic text messages. Toxic partners will also stop you from pursuing your dreams and try to keep you the way you are.

Key Takeaways:

  • Relationships can be full of playful dates, positive emotional growth, and a stream of sunsets and heart emojis.
  • Learning the verbal/behavioral signs of an abusive/narcissistic personality is a critical learning skill for everyone who dates. It’s an issue I work on in therapy with depressing regularity.”
  • We asked experts to break down everyday relationship scenarios and tell us how they’re handled in a healthy relationship versus a toxic one.

“It’s easy to identify physical abuse but very difficult for a person in a toxic relationship to ‘hear’ abuse, especially if the victim was raised around negativity or criticism”

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/7-signs-of-a-toxic-relationship-with-your-so_us_5873ff38e4b0eb9e49bfbe6c?ir=Divorce&utm_hp_ref=divorce

5 Ways To Make Yourself More Attractive In Any Relationship

If you struggle with relationships, you may need a confidence boost to make yourself more attractive to others. The best ways to do this are to not be too serious and do the right thing, even when it’s easier to go the quick route. A little humor and integrity can go a long way. Also, choose to do what makes you happy and put yourself first sometimes. Nothing makes someone like you more than when you are happy and strong-willed enough to work for what you want. Follow these tips and you will see a difference in no time.

Key Takeaways:

  • Feeling good about yourself makes you attractive to others. As you love yourself, life becomes less burdensome and relationships become easier and more spontaneous.
  • You do not have to be perfect to have solid relationships and love in your life. In fact, it’s being imperfect that puts people at ease.
  • A busy quest for validation from others won’t necessarily bring it. In fact, this sign of insecurity may push people away. Instead, do the right thing for yourself, for others, and for society at large.

“Feeling good about yourself makes you attractive to others. As you love yourself, life becomes less burdensome and relationships become easier and more spontaneous.”

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jill-p-weber-phd-/5-ways-to-make-yourself-more-attractive-in-any-relationship_b_13662432.html?utm_hp_ref=divorce&ir=Divorce

Amber Heard’s Latest Divorce Issue Reveals a Greater Struggle Faced by Divorced Women – ATTN

Amber heard if filing from divorce from actor johney. Dep.also facing a greater struggle since most women have a tougher time making it on their own . Regardless of work or not some women never understand the cost of the single life . DEP p is not holding up to his end of the payments in their divorce contract. Thank you for reading my summary.

Key Takeaways:

  • That’s one line from Amber Heard’s request for order motion against ex-husband, Johnny Depp.
  • She filed the motion because she claimed Depp has been holding her finances hostage.
  • Her struggle with the actor reveals a common scenario that probably prevents many women, or at least makes them reluctant, to leave abusive relationships.

“That’s one line from Amber Heard’s request for order motion against ex-husband, Johnny Depp. She filed the motion because she claimed Depp has been holding her finances hostage.”

http://www.attn.com/stories/14061/amber-heards-divorce-struggle-shows-greater-problem

Don’t Confuse Filing With Closure in a Divorce

When we are angry at our spouse, it can be easy to get ahead of ourselves in the heat of the moment. Many think that they should run out and hire a lawyer when they feel they have had enough. Jumping into action instead of settling down and getting your wits about you can end up costing you more money and causing more stress in the end. It takes time to out of a marriage, just like it took time to get into it. Take your time to work through the process logically so you can move on peacefully.

Key Takeaways:

  • Early separation can be exactly the wrong time to divvy up your assets, let alone make critical decisions about your future.
  • The fact is, it takes time to get over a divorce, no matter how quickly you dispense with the legal details.
  • We’d agreed to keep our divorce out of court, and I’d seen too many bad divorces caused by rushing to decide and divide.

“Early separation can be exactly the wrong time to divvy up your assets, let alone make critical decisions about your future. It’s hard to think objectively the week after your spouse moves out.”

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/splitopia/201612/dont-confuse-filing-closure-in-divorce